10 ways to be forever sad

Here are some amazing ways to keep yourself sad – some of it you may be doing , some of it you may have seen your loved ones doing it. Learn few more tips to attain your favourite state of mind – Being SAD.  Never Change any of these that you do and further more never encourage others around you who do this, to change.

  • Speak Lies for no good reason – even when there is no threat to anyone’s lives
  • Never do anything for others – compassion is for the weaker ones !! Always focus only on your life –  I , me and myself are the only people to care for.

Barely there yet  

  • Be late to bed and late to rise – what can we do – part of modern day lifestyle – dont worry , I understand you are forced to do it – you have no choice to choose your timings. Keep doing it.
  • Never do anything on time – don’t meet your appointments, don’t respect your body clock and never respect other’s time – it’s a crime!!
  • Believe in external forces – Always look for happiness as a return gift from others – Dont be happy for your kids, life, parents, education, perfectly moving limbs, sky above or stars in it, trees around or birds on it – thats ridiculous – happiness comes from somewhere else always – never from within ; also, make sure you truly believe that others are the cause of the misery you are going through . Unlike happiness, which is a gift and you have the right of refusal for acceptance , your pain is a genetic gift, YOU HAVE TO ACCEPT IT from the one who is passing on the pain genes to you- glad you understood this.
  • Overspend – spend more than what you earn. But more importantly, don’t keep a tab on your income and expenses (never maintain your log – how much you spent on what or what  money you took from or gave to others )

Am getting bigger   

  • Dont trust anyone – no one’s worth it!!
  • Live in past : Keep playing in your mind your happy times – that are long over. Keep playing the bad times in your mind too – multiple times. Re- live the moments – build the pain inside – one time wasnt good enough.
  • Do this to others – “Shut up and Listen to me” : I am the only one who speaks the truth. There is no such thing as perspective, or opinions or benefit of doubts. Nor there is anything called “Absolute Truth” and if there is some absolute truth – it is what I speak.
  • Give free advice – unasked for –  it doesn’t cost to ramble – so why bother. Whoever in mess, whatever the mess – give your thoughts – doesn’t cost anyone anything. Trust me – there is no such thing as inner personal circle of an individual – spouse or friends – go , tell them how you think they should handle their lives.

Finally there – Absolute Sadness           

I promise you my friend – sadness can not run away from you till you are practicing anyone of the above. Try doing them all – that will take you to the Nirvana state of sadness – better term – Absolute Sadness – no one will ever be able to pull you out of your state, as hard as they may try :))))) sorry – wrong smileys – :((((((((

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5 Terms never heard in a small town

I come from a small town, studied in a mid size city and then moved on to a Metro city post marriage. Though I am well traveled (within my country) and have stayed for varying period of 6 months to 5 years at various places. My longest stay has been in this Metro city (Delhi, India) where I have now stayed around 10 years.

I am spending this week at my parent’s place and was noticing the life at this place, that still remains simpler, comparitively. Things have evolved from the time when I used to know this place correctly. Back then I used to see so many familiar faces, now it has reduced. However, even now when I step out and see the same shops run by same folks, and they still recognize me (thanks to my doctor brothers who stay around and keep in touch with ppl), it gives me a sense of stability and belongingness. I am obviously in love with this place, with the narrow lanes and smiling faces, new buildings and old people.

At tea time today I began to wonder about this topic, that I first thought of, when I was about to begin this trip. I was already comparing my part of life spent here earlier, to the one I spend there in Delhi, even before I reached here. Many differences came to my mind from the social cultural perspective. And that led me to think what was it that was truly different. May be it was Lifestyle, maybe it was mindsets, may be economic parity and maybe priorities in life. Truly, this blog isnt about any serious outcomes of my thoughts. This is more about a a little funny side of it.

I thought of few terms frequently used in one city that was unheard of in another. These are the 5 terms I heard only after I moved out to a big city. And I want to share these with you.

1. VIP movement

I had rarely seen what we call here as “VIP” Movement. When a person with VIP status is moving on road and the traffic is held for common man in order to give a free access to the VIP for his/her destination. Initially, it used to amuse me and then it began to disturb me and now it just gives me time to look around at other frowning faces frustrated due to the unexpected, unplanned delay that were not informed of, in advance.

2. Window Shopping

At my parents place, we always went to market only when we had a need to buy something and we always had a list to adhere to. I didnt knew what window shopping was. My friends introduced me to this term. What I understood of it was – we go to big beautiful shops in swanky malls and look at what they have to offer and check their products , their rates etc. knowing fully well we are not going to buy any of it. Some of us made use of it by looking at potential stuff we might bring in future. It was fun and at times interesting but something I could never get used to or approve of as a time pass activity.

3. Happy Weekend

Weekends are a special time and they are celebrated in a unique way – with lot of planning , this is something I learnt when I started working in this big city. Back home, weekends only meant – longer hours of sleep, and watching some favourite TV programs with family. Maybe also finishing that one long pending task  like cleaning rooms, arranging books. Very few weekends were something we looked forward to as events, or planned about. Most of them were plain and simple.

4. Zero Tolerance Zone

Now this was something I noticed written on a board in front of a house and thereafter noticed it around multiple places.  Later, I realized that house was Vice President’s official residence. So there are certain sensitive areas where there is no fault / mistake of any nature tolerated. But as far as I could understand it more implies to traffic mistakes than others though others not excluded.

5. Play school admission interviews

First hand experience of this. Never heard or seen in my hometown. But had to go through this during my kids school admissions.

This is something I hear inconsistent thoughts about it now – some face it some dont.

Did you have any such differential experience that you may wish to share? New words, new trends that  you learnt or got to see when you went to a new place.

Add action to words

All of us want to live a more effective life. And in this age of so many Leaders and management gurus – who are writing ever innovative stuff to make your life more successful and your time in life more managed – Its easier than before to see a path that shall take one to their required “Nirvana“.
There are so many books of so many motivational authors – from great Stephen Covey to Learned and contemporary Peter Bragan – who teach us on how to plan our lives in the most effective ways and never lose sight of what we wish to achieve and monitor ourselves everyday for our daily targets. Many authors suggest 30-60-90 days plan and also suggest that adding parameters like when and where shall help us achieve what we set out for that day / week / month or year.
Similarly there are countless books written on staying fit and healthy by eating healthy and balanced diet. All kinds of Yoga and meditation, new forms of dances which are hybrids and offshoots of aerobics   everything is suggested. Meditation is termed key.

And then so many of those on life and relationships – how to feel happy about yourself, your work, your relationships etc.. and not be dependent on others for  your actions and reactions. Moral being you hold the key to your happiness.

Then why is it that – though we have access to the best remedies to our respective roadblocks for a fulfilling life – Yet, we are struggling. We are surely not dumb folks. We know knowledge is power and all the words we read in these books are knowledge then what are we lacking?
I will share here my personal experience of while I was feeling at the bottom and being at my lowest troughs in life. And these are truly the times when you are desperately seeking for that one mantra – magic words – that you can lay your hands on that will make you feel better. And I did what most of us do. Hunt down for the most popular books and read the stuff and felt so elated that I could dig gold in it because all of it seemed to make sense. While going through various chapters and stages of the book – it seemed like once I am done with the book all my issues will be resolved and I am going to be the most happy and effective human that ever walked the planet.
So I complete my book, feel happy about it and thank god that I got what I needed and am happy I dont anymore feel the world has ended. I can see a bright light at the end of the tunnel.

But a few days and weeks later – I have another set of problems and I am repeating my process of finding salvation. Another tunnel and another set of light. The story keeps repeating. And we do find some ways to find some alternate solutions eventually.
But what can we do to truly get enlightened and not have to go through the initial pain while looking for a new help everyday – until we find it. Again – I am not talking about different types of guidance required for different types of problems. I am talking about looking for new help everyday for same type of problem.

Well, its easy – it truly is – PUT ACTIONS TO WORDS and thoughts built from the words. What seems to really happen is – when we are reading a management book that is helping us build our roadmap to our goals or understand our relationships in life better or helping us understand our food habits and how to manage our cravings – all that we read seems so logical and agreeable that we dont question it , we dont think about it when we are reading. We act more like reviewers and just put a check against that seems doable to us . We keep planning to follow what is written. And most of us succeed to a certain level before we give up.

What we need to do is :

  • Firstly, figure out your true problem.
  • Review the solutions that seem most suitable and doable
  • Breath it in totality and leave no exceptions Put true ACTIONS to each word.
  • Practice it DAILY – EVERY MINUTE

Dont give up on practicing the ritual – just because the days are less challenging and you seem to be attaining the stability.  This discipline is the core pillar of maintaining this stability in your life.

Wishing you luck in leading a fulfilling life!!!

Please do share with me your experience and feedback on this article and its relevance.